Quotes

Words worth keeping

296 quotes — from Indian and world voices, in English, Hindi and Urdu — while our publisher catalog grows.

Filtered by: Humor Clear all

Ginny!" said Mr. Weasley, flabbergasted. "Haven't I taught you anything? What have I always told you? Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain?

— J.K. Rowling
Humor Trust

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

— Albert Einstein
Humor

Jace shook his blond head in exasperation. "You had to make a crazy jail friend, didn't you? You couldn't just count ceiling tiles or tame a pet mouse like normal prisoners do?

— Cassandra Clare
Humor

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way.

— Steve Martin
Humor Books & Writing

I'm saying that I'm a moody, insecure, narrow-minded, jealous, borderline homicidal bitch, and I want you to promise me that you're okay with that, because it's who I am, and you're what I need.

— Jeaniene Frost
Love Humor

Your friend's poetry is terrible," he said.Clary blinked, caught momentarily off guard. "What?""I said his poetry was terrible. It sounds like he ate a dictionary and started vomiting up words at random.

— Cassandra Clare
Humor

I'll just have them change the entry in the demonology textbook from 'almost extinct' to 'not extinct enough for Alec. He prefers his monsters really, really extinct.' Will that make you happy?

— Cassandra Clare
Humor

In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.

— Terry Pratchett
Humor Science

Must you go? I was rather hoping you'd stay and be a ministering angel, but if you must go, you must.""I'll stay," Will said a bit crossly, and threw himself down in the armchair Tessa had just vacated. "I can minister angelically.""None too convincingly. And you're not as pretty to look at as Tessa is," Jem said, closing his eyes as he leaned back against the pillow."How rude. Many who have gazed upon me have compared the experience to gazing at the radiance of the sun."Jem still had his eyes closed. "If they mean it gives you a headache, they aren't wrong.

— Cassandra Clare
Humor Friendship

There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

— Oscar Wilde
Humor

Beautiful face. Beautiful body. Horrible attitude. It was the holy trinity of hot boys.

— Jennifer L. Armentrout
Humor

Confidence is ignorance. If you're feeling cocky, it's because there's something you don't know.

— Eoin Colfer
Self & Identity Humor Education & Knowledge

What's the good of living if you don't try a few things?

— Charles M. Schulz
Inspirational Humor

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.

— Douglas Adams
Humor

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

— George Carlin
Humor

World quotes adapted from the Abirate/english_quotes dataset (CC BY 4.0). Indian-figure and Hindi/Urdu quotes are a curated compilation of widely-attributed public sayings.